What did you do all day?

I remember once, I think I was twenty, asking my mother, when she was at home with my brother and I when we were little, "what did you do all day?".

One afternoon, it being somewhat hot, I decided to pump up the pool for my oldest, Matthew, who was 5, and my middle child, Andrew, who was 2, to play in. They were thrilled, and happily got their suits on. After pumping the pool up, I went back inside to get my youngest, 4 months.

In the 27 seconds it took me to collect my youngest son, the water in the pool had mysteriously turned a murky, muddy color. When questioned as to how this happened, both my older sons were at a loss for an explanation. My middle son, enlightened me when he demonstrated his newly acquired skill for excavation with his red plastic shovel.

OK, they're boys, right? What's a little mud, anyway? Don't be so uptight, Mama. So, I didn't even comment when the paint came out and the pool was artistically redecorated. I didn't even get angry when my oldest smeared my middle child with red paint (this occurred during the 24 seconds it took me to lay my baby down after he fell asleep on my lap). After my heartbeat returned to normal (the kid looked like he was bleeding all over his body) I could even appreciate the artistic streaks and daubs on his little body. At any rate, he didn't seem to mind in the least, and smeared the paint to cover himself entirely, seeing as his brother had missed a few spots.

Got my middle child headed towards the tub with a minimum of mess tracked through the house. My oldest "helped" me empty the pool and clean up the toys. I told my five year old to take off his suit and get in the tub, with the warning, "please don't touch ANYTHING" on the way to the tub. In the 2 seconds it took me to unhook the screen door, he had taken off his wet, muddy, paint-smeared suit and was swinging it around the room. There are spatters of multicolored mud all over my laundry room.

I yelled, STOP! and he did. Then, he said, "Mama, I have mud in my mouth. I have to spit it out". He missed the sink by a few inches.

This kid will be lucky to make it through puberty alive.